Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that involves one person intentionally undermining another person’s perception of reality, memory, or sanity. It is a tactic used to gain power and control over someone else.
Gaslighting includes different strategies, including denial, minimization, blame-shifting, logical inconsistency, and manipulation. Denial happens when the gaslighter rejects that specific occasions or discussions occurred, in any event, when evidence suggests otherwise. They might guarantee that the other individual is envisioning things or making up stories. Minimization includes making light of the other individual’s sentiments, encounters, or concerns, excusing their feelings as blowing up or being excessively touchy. Blame shifting happens when the gaslighter shifts the fault onto the other individual, causing them to feel answerable for the gaslighter’s way of behaving, making them question their own decisions or aims. Logical inconsistency includes the gaslighter reliably going against themselves or giving conflicting data, driving the other individual to feel uncertain of their own memory or impression of occasions. Control includes the gaslighter utilizing manipulative strategies to control the other individual’s contemplations, convictions, or activities. This can incorporate manipulating, terrorizing, or seclusion to keep up with power and control.
Understanding the Difference: Constructive Criticism vs. Gaslighting
Differentiating between constructive criticism and gaslighting behavior can be challenging, as both involve providing feedback. However, understanding the key factors that distinguish these two is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships and protecting one’s mental well-being. Constructive criticism is driven by the intention to help someone improve or grow. It is offered with genuine concern for the person’s success and aims to provide suggestions for improvement. In contrast, gaslighting is rooted in manipulation, control, and undermining the other person’s perception of reality. The gaslighter’s intention is to exert power and control over the victim.
Constructive criticism is typically communicated in a respectful and empathetic manner. The feedback is focused on specific behaviors or actions, rather than attacking the individual’s character. It is clear and specific, allowing the recipient to understand what needs to be changed or adjusted. The person giving feedback aims to provide guidance without belittling or mocking the recipient. On the other hand, gaslighting often involves personal attacks, mocking, or belittling the person’s self-esteem and confidence. It may involve constant contradictions, denial of previous statements, or intentionally confusing the victim. The inconsistency aims to sow doubt and confusion in the victim’s mind and erode the victim’s self-worth.
Constructive criticism aims to empower the individual to make positive changes and grow. It encourages self-reflection, learning, and personal development. The person receiving constructive criticism is encouraged to take ownership of their actions and make necessary improvements. Although it sometimes feels uncomfortable, it generally does not cause significant emotional harm or distress. Gaslighting, on the other hand, can have a detrimental impact on a person’s mental and emotional well-being. Gaslighting often leads to feelings of self-doubt, anxiety, and even depression.
Educating oneself and recognizing the difference between constructive criticism and gaslighting is essential for maintaining healthy relationships and preserving one’s well-being. By considering the intentions, delivery, consistency, empowerment/control dynamics, and impact on well-being, individuals can discern whether feedback is meant to support growth or manipulate and control. Trusting one’s instincts and seeking support from trusted individuals or professionals can help navigate situations where gaslighting behavior may be present. It is important to prioritize one’s mental health and surround oneself with those who genuinely support personal growth and well-being.
Written by: Farah Saleem
